I hear ya! I took an insta hiatus and it’s been great. I’m only there now occasionally to share links directed here 😄. Being on instagram is like drowning in the middle of the ocean surrounded by cruise ships with passengers who don’t care to see you flailing about.
Seconded!! The irony is it's built to make you pretend like you're performing gold medal standing synchronised swimming, when you're actually flailing!! The analogy keeps on giving.
Your likening it to the ocean scenario is almost word for word how I recently described living with grief after the sudden tragic loss of my mother two years ago. I'm all about my signs and serendipity and pointing them out. Can't wait to check out your Substack Ashley 💕💫
i left IG 3 years ago and now i left FB too, the ads were impossible to manage and it felt overwhelming to scroll on my feed. About a month ago i found substack and this is such a different community, i love being here and i hope it will not change.
I had to reinstall it on my phone a few days ago to make a change (some of what’s possible on mobile isn’t on desktop) and I have got to say - I need to banish it from my phone again. My usage has skyrocketed since putting it back on my mobile! 🫣😵💫
me, a teenager, surrounded by social media since the ripe old age of 10, deleted tiktok at age 11 and now, at the age of 17, was inspired by some random person on the internet to delete instagram, I hope you’re happy 😒. Jokes aside I never really use instagram anymore except to scroll, I used to have a load of online friends there, but as they got busy with life, we talked less and less until we never did, I think I scrolled as a morbid hope they’d randomly text me whilst I was scrolling… they haven’t, and it’s been a while, sooooo ya girl deleted it 😃✨
I definitely think they can exist online, but only between the person they choose to show you and the person you choose to show them, I’m hoping my attention span will get better after deleting it, I still have YouTube but since they are longer videos it won’t be so bad for my attention span :)
@Hiraeth As. a millennial who tried to form connections online for probably a decade and probably did in some way I too lost all of them. It always felt they had more going on in their lives than I did. I've probably had every platform from msn to reddit I've never touched tiktok though or Snapchat.. It all start to feel very disorienting as I'm climbing up into my 30s.
My friends complain I’m a Luddite and look at me as if I’ve contracted some strange debilitating disease. I have not joined TikTok and never will. Under pressure I did create a Facebook page but I hate the UI with a bloody passion and never visit. I created an Instagram page and then deleted it. I created an X account for one day and then savagely deleted it as well.
And all this to support a music project. But you know what? I’ve decided that the road to visibility is strewn with the corpses of untold millions who’ve sacrificed their souls to the tech bros and I’ll have none of it. As you so brilliantly put it, privacy is a luxury worth protecting. Thanks for writing that piece.
I completely agree with you. I left all social media except for Substack and some Telegram groups (but I reduced greatly their number in time). My concern though is that Substack is on the way to become a "traditional" social media too, but for now I'm enjoying the heartfelt and intelligent posts I find here, like yours.
thank you very much! I also have the same fears that substack is going in the wrong direction. notes is great but the short, scrolling format doesn't lend well to its future...
Yeah, we have to give credit to Substack for creating this space and notes but I think that a lot of its beauty comes from the type of people attracted to the idea of this platform.
Maybe it's the algorithm (lol) but I am seeing more and more people jump ship and it's the best feeling. It's confirmation I made the right choice plus I'm excited for everyone to get their life back. My breaking point was on a camping trip with my best friend, at a time when I believed my business's life depended on Instagram and I had to post at a certain time every day to succeed. The post wouldn't post due to lack of service, because . . . camping. And while I ran around positively freaking out, climbing things trying to get a signal, my bestie drank wine and stoked the fire and shook his head. In the midst of that chaos, I was like WHOA.
I'm glad it happened. I needed a good slap in the face.
Love this - and have been gradually scaling back myself. I realize the more time I spend on it, the more insular and angry I become. It's a poison that slowly kills us with each passing spoonful.
Is there room for tech as a tool for a connection or will ads eventually take over? Better yet, would anyone be willing to pay a small fee for an app that actually increased connection without ads? We’ve become used to the “free” model- but when a product is free you are the product. Just curious!
I think that’s where Substack comes in. I was shown this post even though it was posted a wee while ago, so I am still getting pushed content (including vacation photos) similar to Instagram, yet the ads aren’t there there’s lovely writing with it and so far, no vitriol has come across my feed! 😊 I’d be happy to pay a small fee to keep it this way.
Yes to this. I left last week for a month and I am not missing it in the slightest which is so interesting. I really thought I would. I have checked in on messages once. I guess as a business owner I feel worried about leaving completely but I am willing to experiment and see what happens. My biggest concern is not being engaged with Palestine and other forms of activism. I have realised how much of an important place it is for those voices who are marginalised or being actively harmed, I don’t want to turn away from that.
I just wrote a note about how I'm contemplating leaving IG in 2025 (while simultaneously feeling some fear around it) and then stumbled on your piece, which was so refreshing and inspiring to hear! In the little breaks I've taken away from the app, it's felt SO good. But being half-in / half-out is also taking too much mental energy and feels draining... I just get to decide (and I think I know the answer). Thank you for sharing your experience xx
I genuinely enjoyed reading this and its realness💜. Totally relatable about the social media community becoming more daunting to curate and exist in. I simply create a balance between the two whilst prioritizing my present reality by spending more time in nature, simply observing. Simply Being🌸
I am in a toxic, back-n-forth relationship with social media, particularly IG and TikTok. But to your point, when you’re IN IT, you defend it. You make any excuse to stay close to it. I admire the fact that you cut it out cold turkey. I may need to just pick and choose days I allow myself to use it. Great piece ❤️
Yes to all of this! 👏🏻 I am 6 months off IG and reading post like yours reassure me that we are onto something. I love when you say we’ve travelled back in time to a simpler time we thought lost 🧡
Honest and shockingly true! I've gotten off social media about 3 years now and have felt the better and the wiser for it...it was such a manipulation and I felt a slave to it all. My intention was to be inspired and inspiring, but somehow that doesn't truly happen. It's all superficial and sickened me to my stomach.
I hear ya! I took an insta hiatus and it’s been great. I’m only there now occasionally to share links directed here 😄. Being on instagram is like drowning in the middle of the ocean surrounded by cruise ships with passengers who don’t care to see you flailing about.
100% I love that analogy!!! Xox
Seconded!! The irony is it's built to make you pretend like you're performing gold medal standing synchronised swimming, when you're actually flailing!! The analogy keeps on giving.
Your likening it to the ocean scenario is almost word for word how I recently described living with grief after the sudden tragic loss of my mother two years ago. I'm all about my signs and serendipity and pointing them out. Can't wait to check out your Substack Ashley 💕💫
i left IG 3 years ago and now i left FB too, the ads were impossible to manage and it felt overwhelming to scroll on my feed. About a month ago i found substack and this is such a different community, i love being here and i hope it will not change.
I completely agree Daniela!
I love being here too!!! real connection, and amazing writing. so awesome.
I have relegated insta to desktop only and this in itself has been transformational. 🦋🪷
Good for you! That would make a big difference
That’s a really good idea.
I had to reinstall it on my phone a few days ago to make a change (some of what’s possible on mobile isn’t on desktop) and I have got to say - I need to banish it from my phone again. My usage has skyrocketed since putting it back on my mobile! 🫣😵💫
Somehow it’s boring on the big screen! Right?
me, a teenager, surrounded by social media since the ripe old age of 10, deleted tiktok at age 11 and now, at the age of 17, was inspired by some random person on the internet to delete instagram, I hope you’re happy 😒. Jokes aside I never really use instagram anymore except to scroll, I used to have a load of online friends there, but as they got busy with life, we talked less and less until we never did, I think I scrolled as a morbid hope they’d randomly text me whilst I was scrolling… they haven’t, and it’s been a while, sooooo ya girl deleted it 😃✨
Good for you. I don’t think real friendships exist online to be honest. But good for you getting out so young that’s cool and brave x
I definitely think they can exist online, but only between the person they choose to show you and the person you choose to show them, I’m hoping my attention span will get better after deleting it, I still have YouTube but since they are longer videos it won’t be so bad for my attention span :)
@Hiraeth As. a millennial who tried to form connections online for probably a decade and probably did in some way I too lost all of them. It always felt they had more going on in their lives than I did. I've probably had every platform from msn to reddit I've never touched tiktok though or Snapchat.. It all start to feel very disorienting as I'm climbing up into my 30s.
yeah it does, and at some point u just think “fuck this”
My friends complain I’m a Luddite and look at me as if I’ve contracted some strange debilitating disease. I have not joined TikTok and never will. Under pressure I did create a Facebook page but I hate the UI with a bloody passion and never visit. I created an Instagram page and then deleted it. I created an X account for one day and then savagely deleted it as well.
And all this to support a music project. But you know what? I’ve decided that the road to visibility is strewn with the corpses of untold millions who’ve sacrificed their souls to the tech bros and I’ll have none of it. As you so brilliantly put it, privacy is a luxury worth protecting. Thanks for writing that piece.
Good for you Beth
Thanks, and you too!
I completely agree with you. I left all social media except for Substack and some Telegram groups (but I reduced greatly their number in time). My concern though is that Substack is on the way to become a "traditional" social media too, but for now I'm enjoying the heartfelt and intelligent posts I find here, like yours.
thank you very much! I also have the same fears that substack is going in the wrong direction. notes is great but the short, scrolling format doesn't lend well to its future...
Yeah, we have to give credit to Substack for creating this space and notes but I think that a lot of its beauty comes from the type of people attracted to the idea of this platform.
Yes! I see it happening with Substack and it’s so demoralizing to see.
Maybe it's the algorithm (lol) but I am seeing more and more people jump ship and it's the best feeling. It's confirmation I made the right choice plus I'm excited for everyone to get their life back. My breaking point was on a camping trip with my best friend, at a time when I believed my business's life depended on Instagram and I had to post at a certain time every day to succeed. The post wouldn't post due to lack of service, because . . . camping. And while I ran around positively freaking out, climbing things trying to get a signal, my bestie drank wine and stoked the fire and shook his head. In the midst of that chaos, I was like WHOA.
I'm glad it happened. I needed a good slap in the face.
Hahaha Jennie this is the best story I love it! Thank you for sharing it! X
Love this - and have been gradually scaling back myself. I realize the more time I spend on it, the more insular and angry I become. It's a poison that slowly kills us with each passing spoonful.
100%%%%
I saw that in myself. Reading the comments would enrage me.
Social Media - the void where we get lost in what everyone else is doing that we end up just losing ourselves 🫥
So true!!!
Is there room for tech as a tool for a connection or will ads eventually take over? Better yet, would anyone be willing to pay a small fee for an app that actually increased connection without ads? We’ve become used to the “free” model- but when a product is free you are the product. Just curious!
I think that’s where Substack comes in. I was shown this post even though it was posted a wee while ago, so I am still getting pushed content (including vacation photos) similar to Instagram, yet the ads aren’t there there’s lovely writing with it and so far, no vitriol has come across my feed! 😊 I’d be happy to pay a small fee to keep it this way.
Yes to this. I left last week for a month and I am not missing it in the slightest which is so interesting. I really thought I would. I have checked in on messages once. I guess as a business owner I feel worried about leaving completely but I am willing to experiment and see what happens. My biggest concern is not being engaged with Palestine and other forms of activism. I have realised how much of an important place it is for those voices who are marginalised or being actively harmed, I don’t want to turn away from that.
Good for you Ami
You summarized my feelings so well - both for business and engagement with Palestine and other forms of activism.
I just wrote a note about how I'm contemplating leaving IG in 2025 (while simultaneously feeling some fear around it) and then stumbled on your piece, which was so refreshing and inspiring to hear! In the little breaks I've taken away from the app, it's felt SO good. But being half-in / half-out is also taking too much mental energy and feels draining... I just get to decide (and I think I know the answer). Thank you for sharing your experience xx
Thanks for reading Aaliyah! I’m glad it helped! 🤍
I genuinely enjoyed reading this and its realness💜. Totally relatable about the social media community becoming more daunting to curate and exist in. I simply create a balance between the two whilst prioritizing my present reality by spending more time in nature, simply observing. Simply Being🌸
Lovely piece✨
This is beautiful Eunie thank you for sharing and for your support x
I am in a toxic, back-n-forth relationship with social media, particularly IG and TikTok. But to your point, when you’re IN IT, you defend it. You make any excuse to stay close to it. I admire the fact that you cut it out cold turkey. I may need to just pick and choose days I allow myself to use it. Great piece ❤️
Thank you Nikki. Good luck with it all
Yes to all of this! 👏🏻 I am 6 months off IG and reading post like yours reassure me that we are onto something. I love when you say we’ve travelled back in time to a simpler time we thought lost 🧡
Thank you Cynthia - I loved that too!
Honest and shockingly true! I've gotten off social media about 3 years now and have felt the better and the wiser for it...it was such a manipulation and I felt a slave to it all. My intention was to be inspired and inspiring, but somehow that doesn't truly happen. It's all superficial and sickened me to my stomach.
I agree wholeheartedly margarita! X